Tuesday, July 30, 2002

Oh, I remember when I was just a wee lad. The thought of any sort of disease, much less a disease in my eye, was horrifying. I would tremble with terror at the mere prospect of contracting conjunctivitis, or as I knew it, pink eye

However, much has changed. I have grown, and learn to understand one thing:

Pink eye means that you don't have to go to work. I showed up, the boss took one look at my gooey, drippy, pustulating eye, and said, 'Dude. Vacation.'

I would like to make this post a dedication to the wonderful blessing - nae, Godsend - that is pink eye.

Oh conjunctivitis,
You are so kind to me.
You make my eye tickle,
And really really gooey.

My boss said 'Come to work!'
But when I did arrive,
He screamed and told me to leave,
After seeing my oozing eye.

So remember, kids, be wary,
Of cataracts and glaucoma and styes,
But never turn away the advances,
Of our own dear friend, Pink Eye.

Thank you. *bows*

I was inspired you could say....from the last post.

Monday, July 29, 2002

I recieved an e-mail from one of my best friends, that now lives in Arizona, but she has e-mail now and she related to one of the creepy people in my life, [ :D ] so I thought I would post the e-mail cuz it's funnie.

To: wannapancake@hotmail.com
Subject: you're so creepy!
Date: Mon,29 Jul 2002 19:03:00+000

HEy, so i went and looked at your website. It's quite creepy. We'll put a link to your site on ours...yeis.
Hey, i've got something creepy for your site. What about when *Lisa used to wear that Kraft cheesasaurus t-shirt to skool every single day. Do you remember that? I do...and it was pretty damn creepy. Or that guy at the McDonald's in AuGres that was talking to himself...and laughing. That was creepy. Any ways, i have to go a do some shit but i will talk or write to you later

* refers to :D

Saturday, July 27, 2002

Yeis, I indulged myself with my boredom and drew a creepy comic.

Tee Hee!

Friday, July 26, 2002

Ode to thee Tavern of Hale, Mi

Creepiness Rating : 50 kajillion billion

Creepiness Factor : 50 year old drunk man, lifting my shirt sleeve up with a pencil so he could see my tattoo without permission.

Creepy Response : Kerrington's usual " Ahhhhhhhh."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Okay, I will explain. I am sitting with my friends at the bar, listening to them gossip about hand-jobs and other such activites one might want to talk about, when this creepy old man sticks a pencil under my right arm shirt sleeve.


So I quickly turn my head to see what the FUCK is going on. He was just looking at my tattoo... but it would have been nice for him to just ask instead of pretty much VIOLATING ME! I give him a " ewww your creepy look " after he's done, and him and his two companions are pretty much oogling me which is creepy because one is HUGE and old, and the other one is around my age but skanky. So after I turn my head back to my friends they are all in fits of their laughter. The would be laughing too cuz they know EXACTLY how I feel, because I guess the same old guy tried buying them drinks last Friday and macknig on them til they finally left.

It wouldn't have been so bad if he was british and goodlooking...but no, he had to be weird looking and creepy.

Also at the bar, there was a massive amount of ladies with Camel Toe.

Just thought I would brighten your day! :D

Thursday, July 25, 2002

I thought that this animal deserved to be posted, since it is VERY CREEPY LOOKING! It's called a Saiga...no no, not SEGA...Saiga. Creepy lookin thing as it may be, it's kinda cute in that fecked up way. ;P

Wednesday, July 24, 2002

I thought this was kinda funnie. Hahahahahha.

What Kind of Harry Potter Are You?

Oh kerrington oh kerrington...will you make me some tea.....

Dont pee in the water

Dont soil the sheets

Kerry oh kerry why dont you like to bathe

You eat the dirt on the floor then spit on brads face

Sorry Im trying to not focus on midterms. How sad it is to be me. Oh whoa!

Tuesday, July 23, 2002

And my last thoughts were: " Mmmmm Subway."

Tee! Today was kinda a creepy experience...more sad than creepy but still it had it's creepiness factor.

I went to West Branch today cuz I was putting my applications in, and then I was going to go out to my college and sign up fer my classes. Well, I stopped at the Shell station fer some gas, and there was an ambluance there. Well I just thought that EMT people were just there getting something to eat, cuz it's a Subway too. Well I walk in to pay fer my gas, and theres a really old lady sprawled out on the floor infront of the subway station. She must have just fainted or something cuz people weren't really freaking out like the lady died, but there were EMT workers huddled all around her and stuff and she wasnt moving...so I dunno. It was creepy cuz there were people still ordering food, and people just standing there watching..


Some people are so fucking Cletus around here. I know I would be pissed if I was passed out in some publick place with people gawking and other people still getting there fecking sammiches.


I dunno, it just pissed me off mainly cuz people were like still getting sammiches... McDonalds, and every other food establishment was just next door.


I hope the lady didn't die though... If she did, her last thoughts were prolly " Yes, I want Mayo."

* * *
Anyways. After that I went to my school and did stuff there, then I went back thru West Branch on my way home, cuz I wanted to get a few more applications. First I stopped at this PINK restarant called "Sandys." I go in and a wave of creepiness just surged through out my entire being. First off, the place is TINY. 2nd, there was this creepy old man with white hair sticking out from his head like wings, thick red glasses, a cane, suspenders and creepy snaggle teeth...just STARRING at me while I waited fer the waitress to get me an application. Then this little girl, prolly like 5 came out of the bathroom. She was HUGE! How can you let some kid get that big. Jeebus! Then she started starring at me. Just imagine a Plump, 3 foot, blond haired girl..just starring at you. She looked kinda like some Goblin out of ' Legend' with Tom Cruise frolicking around in green spandex. Creepy.

Then I went to this place called "Mill End." Pretty much a store for bikers and other odd things. Well I go in and you have to take a 'math test' with the application. After I fill out my App, I move to the math test...
What the feck is this!

+ 2.99


You wouldn't *believe* the kinda things that were on there. like " whats 5047243857475 times 36437681654 to the 376465 power!?"

I dont freaking know! Jebus!

So I get thru the first question...it took me 7 minutes.. No way in hell am I stayin, sitting in the shoe chair, for 4 hours while I fill this out, and not get a job because my math SUCK anyways!

I took the clip board and walked up to the desk, thankfully the lady was facing the other way, I put it silently on the desk, and RAN out.

Never. Again.

Sunday, July 21, 2002

:D : hey do you know if bRad will be online
Kerrington22: No i dont think he will be on tonight
:D : ohhh okay, you didnt' come in and see me tongiht?
Kerrington22: uh... was I supose too?
:D : well didn't you say last night that you were going to come into the restaurant
Kerrington22: oh...
Kerrington22: well we decided to go to the bears den n whatnot
:D : ahh

brad brad brad brad brad

Friday, July 19, 2002

Dreams must really have a meaning

Before I start this, read the post below to get an idea of what I am talking about ...tee!

Anyways... I get to work 10 minutes early and I do my work.. then the stupid BITCH 16 year old pregnant white trash whore comes in and takes over the sink...

For starters...Ill give you a breif summary of "Brandy"
"Brandy is like 16, pregnant, white trash and she looks like Helga from Hey! Arnold. Well she thinks she owns the place, but has only worked there for a few weeks. First off she only does dishes. if you are a dishwasher you do everything: wash dishes, put dishes away, mop floors, sweep floors, take out trash, do prep...basically you are everyones bitch. But all she does is do the dishes. I ask her to help and shes like " i cant". So everyone knows shes a stupid loser, who probably shouldnt be working in the restarant bidness if she cant pull her own weight... so who ends up doing EVERYTHING! ME!! ME! ME!"

well tonight was NOT busy at all so it was kinda boring..just standing there...so :D (my creepy cousin, who now goes by the smiley face of colon, capital D) her name is Lisa... well Lisa asks me if I will slice some Turkey cuz they got some tickets up and the stupid Prep Cook didnt do sqwat today so they had to hurry up and make up for everything that the prep cook didnt do. Well I prepare the turkey chunk and I go over and start putting it on the slab... then my boss (who resembles a gnome) comes up and says this in a stern voice:

"Carrie, You dont need to do that, you need to let them [cooks] do that so you can start working on the dishes."

Carries brain: - what the HELLL did you just say you ugly sac of balls-

I peel off my gloves throw them into the trash can storm out with the 2 plates and soup cup and put them away.. I go back into the kitchen to see a stunned look on Brad and Lisas faces.

Brad- "Dude...dude.. that was bad..dude."
:D- " :D :D what the heck!"
Carrie- " THATS IT! BYE!!" *Carrie proceeds to the back area, Carrie takes off apron, Carrie throws it on the floor, Carrie grabs keys, Carrie leaves and goes home to read Harry Potter and bitch at brother*


So bascially that is it.. I walked out.. I was sooooooooooooooooooooo pissed... you could see my eyes glint with pure and utter ...I dont think there is a word even conceived to make the word " angry" sound more threatening... as to how I felt.

The. Fucking. Bitch.

GOD FORGIVE ME TO GO OUT OF MY WAY TO TRY AND BE NICE AND HELPFUL... noo noo noo!! that would be "wrong"

-Makes a voodoo doll of Renee and takes a huge dump on it then lights it on fire-

Grrrrrrrrrr.....I had a dream this morning that pissed me off so bad...

In my dream, I went to work 15 minutes early so I could beat this stupid slut whore to work before she had a chance to get the dishwashing spray thingy... So I get there and I'm just standing around cuz the other dishwashers are still washing cuz it isnt their time to leave yet.. So I'm standing there talking to :D and Brad while I wait...
Theres this kid who works there as a dishwasher, and by all accounts is the most ANNOYINGEST PIECE OF ORGANIC MATTER, EVER. I sware he lives to annoy the piss outta me. Well I'm trying to be nice and help scrape something off of a pan, when Ryan starts spraying it from a 5 foot distance...thus getting water all over me.


He keeps doing it!! Then he sprays water all over me on purpose!!! So it leaves a HUGE puddle in the middle of the floor... then my boss comes in and shes like,


"But look! He sprayed water all over me and on the floor!"

"GET OUT!" She doesn't even care! She should be yelling at Ryan and not me!! Bitch!


So I go back into the back area where Brad is making pizza dough and I start bitching about how Renee isn't being fair, and what Ryan did and blah blah, then I notice Big Bob is back there... then I wake up. Shit. Fuck. Piss.

I hate having dreams about work cuz I always get pissed off...gawddamnit!

Thursday, July 18, 2002

Do any of you know where my pants are? :D
I have a blister on my thumb from widdling some wood today.. it hurts...

My brother did something random today. He came in to the house and was like " Hey Carrie, let's go to California!"

-blank stare-

" I'm serious!"



Wednesday, July 17, 2002

Thyarr: *giggles*
Kerrington22: ....
Kerrington22: ahh....
Kerrington22: that was scary lol
Thyarr: Someone here wants to see you...
Thyarr: :D
Kerrington22: oh...my...god... you ...are...so...CREEPY!
Thyarr: :D HI CARRIE! How are you! What is happening?
Kerrington22: - cringes and pretends that she is very very small -
Thyarr: :D You cannot hide! I see you! Come out and give me a hug!
Thyarr: :D i am under your bed.
Thyarr: :D i am alwaaays watching.
Thyarr: :D i am :D. I have eaten him.
Kerrington22: Ok.. seriously stop...
Kerrington22: roflmao
Thyarr: :D i will spit him out and make him pleasure me later.
Kerrington22: ....omg.... my side... hurts..stop...
Thyarr: :D Woaaaaaow!
Kerrington22: ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kerrington22: - dies -
Kerrington22: You capture :D perfectly...
Thyarr: :D uh oh. i better give you CPR. *moves in*
Kerrington22: dude stop... you are feckin creepy
Kerrington22: No more pills for you!
Thyarr: :D can I ask you a stupid question???
Kerrington22: lol... sure...
Kerrington22: :D FECES!
Thyarr: :D You love brad don't you! well he's MINE! MINEMINEMINE!
Thyarr: :D someday me and brad are gonna have baaaabeeees.
Kerrington22: Oh darn, well you might have a problem because me and brad have orgies with Jesskas mom and her 35 year old slut
Thyarr: :D hm...i must follow this jesska's mom around...and creep her out..
Kerrington22: Im going to post this....
Kerrington22: lol
Thyarr: :D post it! i want my love for brad to be public!!!!
Thyarr: :D brad wants to talk now, though. TTFN!!!!!!!
Thyarr: Whee.
Kerrington22: lol... TTFN YOU CREEPY FAG!
Kerrington22: Ok Brad...how about tomarrow after work I take to you to the Phsyc ward...
Kerrington22: and leave you there cuz that was incredibly horrifying..
Thyarr: Yeah...at least :D couldn't get to me in a padded cell...
Yay! I made a button link thingy fer Creepy Comics..yeiis..it's pretty ghetto looking but I dun care... I think it is pretty...


yayyyyy! yayyyyy! yayyyyyyyyyyyyyy!


Dude...and here you are with a birthday comin up and all. I know what is on your wishlist.

I know you think theyre hawt and all but they look like guiny pigs to me ass head.

Tuesday, July 16, 2002

Nothing creepy has happened to me in the past few days.. i don't know what is wrong...there is a lack of creepiness in the world.. -flicks a tear from her cheek-

Oh wait... Maria is kinda creepy so I guess I will write a wee story about her. ( And I am not asian ;P )

Once upon a time, there lived a Mexican by the name of Maria Lang. She got married to K.d Lang and just got done having their sixth child with her-him.

"Oh Maria, you look so beautiful when you have placenta wrapped all around your legs!" Kd. Lang said.
"I know K.d...sometime we shall have to go to Canada and get that recipe for placenta cassarole."

Ok...I am even creeping myself out by writting that so I will stop.
Yeah! It's true.....I do like to play hopscotch naked. There is nothing wrong with that......at all. Well anywho, considering I dont know who the rest of Kerrys British wild pack is......I'll assume their all homos who like to wear pink unicorn sweaters. Kinda sorta like this masculine dreamboat..

I actually know this fellow and I vouch for him when asked if he digs womenz. DUH! Of course he does. Oh blah...but yeah.....the lesbian kerrry who runs this site owes me butt secks!
Question for kerrington tea........if your so british then why are you so asian? huh??

Sunday, July 14, 2002

My Book is Sexy

I rolled out of bed today at a mere 11:30, a relative blasphemy to the time I should be getting up on my day off. I was dreaming that a waiter at work was giving me an order for like, 3 million pizzas. And I was immediately about to run crying out the door, but then I realized, “Hey. No one orders 3 million pizzas. And we don’t have waiters at our restaurant, because Bob couldn’t ogle them! This must be a dream.” So I was like, “F-you waiter! I don’t have to do these pizzas because it’s a dream!”

Then I woke up.

I stumbled downstairs, and in a startling show of initiative, I threw myself onto the couch and started to read.

I read for about five minutes before getting really fucking pissed. The book I’m reading is good – so good that I end up reading it for hours on end. I’ve even laughed out loud at it a few times, a feature that I hate in books, because it always invokes weird stares from anyone who happens to be around - stares that insinuate that I’m some sort of nut for laughing at a book. Well, you can politely die and burn in hell for thinking that.

But regardless, I’m pissed off because I can NEVER get comfortable on this couch while reading. I just end up rolling around until I almost fall off of the damn thing. So I throw my MP3 player and book into the back of my car and head to my Grandparents’ cottage, which I had to do anyway later because my mom is annoying.

I arrive, and get down to the beach, where I’m assaulted by my tipsy mom and her friends, who somehow persuade me to go on a pontoon boat ride with them. After that horribly boring foray into the lake, I finally have time to read. I haul a lawn chair out of the hellish crawlspace under the cottage, set it up on the beach, and read.

I sit and read for two hours. That’s a pretty good stretch. I probably would have kept on reading, too, but I realize that my mom standing above me, tapping my arm. She apparently has been saying my name for some time, trying to get my attention, but I have my headphones turned up loud enough to thwart such efforts to get my attention.

I could kill her. It’s rare when I’m comfortable enough to read for two hours without even moving, much less be interrupted by her. She wants me to bring up the towels off the boat. Or something. I got pissed and went home, checked my e-mail, and watched Dogma.

Fast-forward to tonight. Kerrington sends me a message reading, “your entries will be like ‘I played on my computer today...then i watched dogma’”

The woman is psychic. She is, by all accounts, “different”

Be good kids, and make sure to eat your Asbest-Os.

Saturday, July 13, 2002

Boss 'n Ass

Greetings... Last night at work was realllyy creepy. The reason for this assumption is because I THINK MY BOSS FINALLY GOT LOTS OF SEX !!! She was in a superrrrr good mood...usually shes bossy and pissy and you just want to ram a mustard bottle up her ass. But last night she was soooo....creepily nice. Strange. She must have gotten laid by her 400 lbs husband...cuz I don't think there is any other reason for her joy. Plus...they didn't come into the restarant until around 5pm...they ALWAYS come in at 3pm... and no one could get ahold of them either eheheheh...so yah, they were getting it on.


She must have gotten lots of secks again last night, cuz this morning she was reallllyyy happy too. She was cracking jokes n stuff...even to me... and I KNOW she dispises me for some unknown reason. But yah...it was nice.
I don't think I am ever going to get my website done by next week, cuz my stupid mom keeps hogging the stupid computer to write her stupid book. Why can't she use to fecking laptop.

"I need to use THIS computer..." NAR NAR NAR!!!

I can never get any peace...along with my dad always being drunk in the afternoon sitting outside on the picnic table babbling,yelling at the dogs and trying to talk to me about the art of making bird baths...... gahhh.. well at least he is a nice drunk man. hehe.

-sings Constant Craving by K.D.LANG-

You like that song...ohhh yyoouu knowwww you do!!

Wednesday, July 10, 2002

Comb Overs and Tattoo's

Greetings fellow creepies...

I got a tattoo last night...It hurt like a MO FECKING FO! All I gotta say is that I almost felt like peeing my pants from the pain. Hahahaha. The guy that did it, did a REALLY good job too. He was a bit strange, he didn't talk much... and he had a comb over thing going on. bahahaha. And the other guy that was their thought I was stoned for some reason...prolly cuz he was. anyways... Comb Overs are so funnie... why not just shave ure friggin head. This is what the tattoo looks like
They are not good pictures just yet cuz I have a shitty web-cam, but on Saturday I do plan on taking better pictures with a real camera...Hopfully it won't be all scabby hehehe. The tattoo artist was grabbing ahold of my arm so hard I have bruises from it.
My friend Jesska and Brad went with me to watch me be in pain for the 60 minutes that it took. They laughed. bastards. heh. After that we went to McDonalds and the cash register chick asked me what happened to my arm... cuz plainly it looked like someone beat the shit outta me (well at least my arm) cuz there was ink, blood and everything else rubbed all over my arm. Hehehe. I've already got ideas for what I'm going to put around it to make it look less...uh..der...


The Tattoo itself is of Professor Snape, from the Harry Potter Books, he is my favorite character because he is a jack-hole bastard, and I love jack-holed bastards! Well i got the picture from this SITE I have been going to with art work this very talented chick does. She makes me jealous ;P .She has a Harry Potter gallery n such and had a special shirne for Snape and so I took the one picture that I liked and got it done because I just LUUBBBB the picture to death. TEE. Yes I know I'm creepy. I'm thinking of getting the same sized box on my left upper arm of a different picture of Snape just for the hell of it...cuz it would look sweet... YES IT WILL! I am now addicted to tattoo's and I'm planning on getting an assload...even tho they hurt..they look sweet. Hehehe.

Lesson fer today: Touch a pig.

Monday, July 08, 2002

Smoking a fag in the rain really sucks.

Sunday, July 07, 2002

Little Fuck Twats

What really annoys the piss out of me is when I get kicked out of a chatroom for NO FUCKING REASON.

Alright, when I get bored, I go online and go into chat rooms about a subject that interests me. This time it is Harry Potter (yah I know it sounds lame but suck it hehe). So I went to Mugglenet.com to make snide comments without the 12 year olds knowing that it was mean, because obviously their stupid bovine fucks. So I go in there, just sitting and watching and there is this stupid, prolly 10 year old girl in there talkin to me thinking I'm a guy cuz I'm using the name "Snape_Drape." She just assumed that I was a guy and was like being creepy to me. So I was trying to tell her to leave me alone without being mean, cuz I didn't want to get kicked. And a girl came in there that knew I was a girl cuz she asked the other day cuz we were making fun of people a bit. Well the girl that was "flirting" with me stopped talking so I asked her why she was so quiet. Then she said cuz she didn't like me, then got her 10 year old henchman to tell me that I was a "freak" Hey, I didn't say I was a guy, she just assumed, she's the stupid ball-sac that didn't ask, and nicely at that. DONT GO MAKING ASSUMPTIONS, DINK!

OH THAT HURT! *laughs ass off* A 10 year old telling me that I was a freak, and telling me that "DUR" wasnt a word. No fuck it isn't dip shit, but it's a word people do use to show that you are a complete and utter retarded ass-licker.

So I was like " Ehh no skin off my back."

Then I got kicked by some 12 year old prolly, with the kick saying something like " Stop being a Butt-Ass"

Okay, now who's the one with the bad grammer... Butt and Ass are the same thing, Twat-Bag.

So I'm gonna go in there and keep on being creepy to little kids cuz they are stupid dog feckers. All they do in their is swoon over stupid shit, it's quite entertaining actully.

*Golf Claps*

Lesson for today: Make sure to tell small children they suck.

Wednesday, July 03, 2002

I had a creepy experience today at the Post Office. I had to go and buy one stamp ( which are up to 37cent right now...stupid mail-whores!) and while I was walking in, there was a mother and her son infront of me doing their bidness at the front desk. Well the son must have either been slow, or like mentally fecked up in some way, just a wee bit... but not to the point where you could tell there was something wrong with him at first glance...he could contain himself pretty good you could say. Or maybe he just had an interesting imagination.

Well anyway, he was prolly around 8 or 9, a little over weight and he had a shaved head with a huge mole on his right temple.. He looked just like an ordinary little boy with no mental problems... until he decided to creep me out.

Well, I was standing behind this island thingy waiting for my turn and he came right up to me as soon as I stood in my spot and said, "snake."


So, I was like, "Uh...yah ok" and adverted my eyes so he would go away and I was thinking " thatwascreepythatwascreepythatjustdidNOThappen." He eventually did walk away after starring at me for about 15 more seconds and twirling around a pen attatched to the island, but he kept looking at me and then up in the air and smiling and kept opening his mouth like he was going to say something, but didn't. I was totally creeped out. haha. It's not everyday some strange child waddles close to you and says something totally random. -cry-

So the lesson for today is: Stay away from small children in Post Offices.

Tuesday, July 02, 2002

You know what's really funnie, Is like when you go to a web-stie, and you find a picture you REALLY REALLY like, so you do a right-click and a Save As, But they have it protected, with one of those fecking stupid pop up windows that says something along the lines of: " HAHAHAHA YOU CANT STEAL THIS IMAGE! ITS PROTECTED!".

Well... I figured out a way to get around that hehehehe. I'm sure everyone prolly already knows how to do that but I'm going to tell anyways. All you gotta do is open up a blank Browser Window, make sure you make the two windows small enough so you can see each window on the screen, then just click on the image and drag it over to the new browser window and it will pop up on that... then you can save it!


But, yah.. anyways, that pisses me off when people are like " hahaha you cant save my picture!" WHO'S LAUGHIN NOW DUMB-ASS! -boo-hiss-